its 1.30am and i finally get to chill and relax before i call it nite nite time.. this part of Melaka comes to life at this hour but im enjoying this corner of Holiday Inn Melaka where it seems like i am in a cocoon like atmosphere looking out at the busy world while i am safe in my haven.. bliss
the past few weeks past really fast as if its a blink of an eye.. with STEP FORWARD getting good feed back, MCG2 going on strong with the school visits and reaching to the next generation of decision makers .. it makes me feel calmer and assure of what i am doing might just be the right thing..
the feeling of total strangers walking up to you and acknowledging your work in many sense gives me a certain good feel that sooths my tired mind and body .. alhamdullilah.. i don't deny that at times it does get a bit over whelming but everytime that happens i've learned to just close my eyes and imagine the people who matters to me and the support that they have been giving me all this while and that helps to make things ok for the time being..
now sitting here i kinda know that the decision that ive made to take things into my own hand in order so that i could have a better nights sleep is not too bad of an idea.. at least with that i feel secured and more certain as too my decisions and actions..
im still trying to finish "letters to sam" a book that i picked up a few months ago.. while i do so i learn lessons that seems to be just plain common logic.. i realized that i am a person that sometimes let my emotions take over my common logic in matters of work, love and friendship.. i try to go abouts it differently but at the end of the day i fail badly.. hahahahaha ironic.. the hard exterior that i try to potray usually becomes a weapon againts me at the end of the day..giving in and compromising at times seems to be the best solution but in all honesty it sucks.. hahahahaha..i guess no one can be perfect in that way.. but i got to learn to stand up and decline at times not much to other people but basicly to my own mind and emotions.. pushing it at times might also not be the right choice and swallowing pride, emotions and guilt might just make things better.. just as long as principles are kept i guess i would be allrite..
This wave has such a strong under current running thru it and while i enjoy this surf i will still try hard to balance my act as to keep things at a more civil minded possition..its a lonely surf i would have to say but then a wave gives better milledge if you ride it alone... i call upon others to take baby steps in whatever they pursue and thus maybe this is my baby steps.. insyallah everything would be allrite.. thank you all for the support as i truly appreciate it.. aite im gonna go to bed long day ahead tomorrow.. good nite :)