Mengejar Matahari

i was flipping thru channels just now and caught this indonesian flick Mengejar Matahari... it mainly revolved around this character and his relationship with 3 of his other friends that grew up together... and how their friendship blossoms and grew as time passed... how innocents lost and knowledge gained and striving to turn dreams into reality....
anyways i am not here to give a review of the movie.. please no no i'll spare you guys... but what really caught my attention was when the character said that "berbagai orang keluar dan masuk didalam kehidupan ini tetapi yang kekal dihati itu adalah teman sejati."... ok fine i am a sucker when it comes to staying loyal and holding a friendship ghosh.. i just hope some people share how i feel hahahaha...i think that is too much to ask... but i have always seen the truth in that statement...
many of us because of being caught up in this whole rat race and this whole spure of the moment that we forget and we tend to take people for granted...how many of us are guilty of being caught being happy and celebrating with people that we have just met and yet discarding people that have been there for us all this while and only remembering them when it comes as an importance to us... i can say i am as guilty in that as anyone else is...
the whole feeling or spirit of "Brotherhood" or "Loyalty" don't seem to really creep in... we claim we have it.. we hope we have it.. but then its never evident... but then hummm.. i dont know the more i think about this subject the more depressed i get.. its very late am going to try to get up early from tomorrow onwards... orang tua-tua kata rezeki tak masuk kalau bangun lambat... oh ya i am gonna now make this blog public thus i will be announcing that Baki Zainal owns this blog... nite all.

Big Ben

Hurray!!!
on the 19th i received an email confirming my trip to london some where end of the year... the best thing is that i would be working along side people from the SOHO theater company in london huhuhuh... i would not create the same mistake that i did with NYFA last year... this time around i am going so help me GOD.
Watching the program that i help build growing and receiving really good viewership just makes me grin from side to side... one cant stop to feel proud but i shall not gloat at it... but downside of this job is that paychecks come in big but late... ahhhhh....im down to my last RM2 hummm how am i to survive? lets just see.
oh ya bit of self indulgence today on my blog my skin is starting to peel... soo sad i look extreamly ugly if the elephant man was to go againnts me in a beauty pageant i'll loose thumb down(as if thats something different) hahahahahahahaha allrite nite nite all

burned

My body is in pain….. help hahahahahaha….i sat in the sun too long by the beach “fishing”. It was an extremely calming experience…but then now since my skin is burned I guess it’s a price that I have to pay…oh man I think I have had too many holidays within the given 3 months of 2007…that I am constantly in a holiday mood and am just figuring where to go next…everything has to be done in moderation but I guess moderation does not fit into my dictionary…
Guess what I did not even have time to click away on the camera…. I was so busy fishing that I forgot all about saving some memories on still…but just being there among the waves, looking out into the horizon with a rod within your strong grip holding it erect so that any vibrations from the rod could be felt. Waiting, waiting patiently while your mind leaves itself blank and like a sponge soaking in every sensation that could be felt while the sun bless you with its warm rays… and when the rod rocks and you tighten your grip and reels it home while your victim puts up a fight and pulling forth as you pull back, while finally you get to see the results is just amazing….
Being there and looking out into the horizon I cant stop to feel tiny compared to his other creations…realizing that within seconds I could just be swallowed and without realization never have existed…. Life is just too short and precious I guess for us to pay attention to pity little things mind you not details put pity little things that we fight about on a day to day basis…neglecting people that we love and care and sometimes because of the big E swallowing certain emotions that we would have wanted them to know…. Is it really worth it? I guess I don’t have the answer and the feeling of not constantly having the answer is bliss… not having to know…. For you guys who are reading this I MISS YOU…THANK YOU…. I APPRECIATE YOU… YOU ARE CHERISHED…. YOU ARE LOVED.
I don’t want to create the same mistake again….
Hahahahaha funny how I just wanted to scribble on my adventures to pahang… arghhh… allrite guys till then.

the downs of having a lap top

Having a lap top has lots of good use to it but on the downside.. specially when your boss knows that you can do your work any where.... why...

big waves

ok.. i know i just came back from a holiday, but here i am on the beach typing away as the breeze hits me and the waves coming to shore... i am now in this place called pasir hitam in pahang...
i am at peace as i am with my element... althou i am still in hope of london but yeah its taking my mind away from the waiting.. hahahaahaha ok guys i shall update my blog again when i reach kl with more pictures of me and my muse hahahahhaha i feel like bel and mimi now... till then nite nite

i cant sleep

it is a very warm night(i wonder why in the first place did i buy that warm comforter in ikea for) even the aircon aint doin it right.....
it does not help with me being used to turning in at 4am or 6am in the blinking morning for the past god knows month...i have work to work 2morow and i can sleep(i so wish that this house has a bath tub that i could just run a nice bath and put my sleep into lala land)...
i kinda realized for the past year or so that i started to blog, most of my entries are just bout me bitching on life and certain incidents that happens to me.. i envy people who could actually post really good mind boggling articles or topics on their blogs.. i mean i thank the al mighty that i dont specify the meatballs i had for lunch on my blog or even the event of me shaving my pubes on the site but just in general things that i cant rant in life to other people and hoping that i dont sound self indulgence like... hummm....
i'll be home alone for the weekend as family is heading down south for a couple of days and i have a few things that i need to sort out, theres the coffin aint big enough, theres the cloudbreak exchange interview(please god i really want london) and of course the inconvinient truth( did i spell that right) and i shall try to see how will i balance all this on the budget that i have currently..hahahahahahaha.. i wonder how sasha is doing now that nik is in hawaii.. good luck babes..
see its still just bout me.. and nothing else(i so hope that i dont sound like this in real life coz then people would think or have already think that i am soo into me) i know its not a crime or anything but i just feel like its a habit that i have to kick... the initial idea of having this blog in the first place is to share with this world bout things that i'm concern about(and yes al-gore beat me to it damn those americans hahahahahahaha) and yet the only thing that came out from the tapping of my fingers on my keyboard is just plain complaints and bitching on how life has been dealing me a bad deck and ruining my grand plans(hey i could have been among the two that they sent over to russia for the space program k)....
huhhhhhhh.. maybe i should just try... but i wont want to come across as trying to sound smart while in real life i'm not that smart( its the weirdest and the stupidest thing a person can do) they say that you should write bout something that is close to your heart. then i guess my frens this is whats close to my heart.. or maybe infact i am just a sad case that does not have anyone to rant my life to....

since you've been gone

sometimes i think too much... hummm...
i guess theres not too much to worry and that there is still hope..
eventhou it wont be as how it was last time and having to share but the feelings are still there... to be honest i missed it soo badly....
but i shall be gratefull for the moments tht i get...
and silently pray that it would one day return to how it used to be...